Insecurities can be a major barrier to living life to the fullest. They can prevent us from pursuing our dreams, reaching our goals, and forming meaningful relationships with others. But it’s not easy to recognize when we’re feeling insecure or why, making it hard to change our lives.
Fortunately, there are some telltale signs that reveal insecurity in people. If you know these signs, you can identify your issues more clearly and take steps to overcome them. Here are 15 common signs of insecurity so that you can start making positive changes today!
You act like Mary Poppins
You may not realize it, but if you find yourself constantly cheerfully singing and acting like the iconic character from the movie, chances are that you’re hiding your feelings of inadequacy.
People who suffer from insecurity often try to mask it through upbeat behavior, so watch out for signs like singing in public or putting on an overly polite attitude—these can all be indications of inner turmoil.
You lead with your sexuality
Leading with your sexuality is a common way of hiding underlying insecurities. It’s a defense mechanism that gives you an illusion of control and power to mask feelings of vulnerability and inadequacy.
People who lead with their sexuality tend to dress provocatively, throw out sexual innuendos, talk about sex openly, and use flirting as a way to gain attention or validation. It’s important to recognize the signs so you can address the root causes of these behaviors before they spiral out of control.
You’re a disagreement machine
People who are hiding insecurities may often disagree with others, even when they know they are wrong. This behavior usually attempts to protect their fragile ego and avoid being seen as vulnerable.
Disagreements can also divert attention away from their shortcomings and onto someone else’s faults. Pay close attention to your conversations and watch for signs that someone might be using them to mask their insecurities.
You become a shrinking violet
Insecurity can manifest in different ways, including by becoming a shrinking violet. When someone is insecure, they may try to blend into the background and avoid interaction with others, as they fear being judged or criticized.
This can lead to them fading into the crowd and not wanting to be noticed. It can also prevent them from making meaningful connections with people and participating in activities that could benefit their development.
You’re an unrelenting people pleaser
Many people hiding insecurity will try to please everyone around them to gain acceptance and approval. This can take the form of unrelenting people-pleasing, where they constantly put others before themselves and adjust their behavior to accommodate the desires of others.
Those struggling with insecurity may even go out of their way to do favors for those around them, no matter the cost. Recognizing this behavior is key to understanding the underlying insecurity and taking steps toward self-acceptance.
You’re an arrogant you-know-what
People may act superior, put others down, or talk incessantly about themselves, but it often covers up a deep-seated insecurity that they don’t want the world to see.
You can’t maintain eye contact
One of the key signs that someone is hiding their insecurity is an inability to maintain eye contact. When a person feels insecure, they tend to avoid looking people in the eye because they are afraid of being judged.
They may also look away quickly when making conversation or feel uncomfortable if the other person stares too long at them. It’s important to watch for this type of behavior and ensure that you don’t make anyone feel uncomfortable or unwelcome in your presence.
You use everyday objects as armor
One of the common signs that you are hiding insecurity is the use of everyday objects as armor. You may find yourself carrying around a large bag with all your essentials, wearing oversized clothing, or having a constant need to be on your phone.
All these things can act as a shield, protecting you from the outside world and allowing you to keep your insecurities hidden. This behavior can become more extreme if left unchecked, so it is important to recognize it and work towards overcoming it.
You avoid contact
One common sign that someone may be hiding insecurity is avoiding contact with the outside world. This could mean avoiding social gatherings, avoiding eye contact during conversations, or even shying away from physical contact with others.
People who are struggling with insecurity may also choose to stay away from activities they used to enjoy as a way of avoiding any potential judgment.
You’re a bobblehead doll
People often use body language to express their insecurities without knowing it. If you find yourself nodding your head in agreement with everything someone says, you may be a bobblehead doll—a person who is hiding their insecurity by not expressing their own opinion and instead just following the crowd.
This unconscious behavior reveals deep-rooted feelings of insecurity and fear of being judged or wrong. Be aware of this behavior, as it can lead to resentment from others due to feeling like they are not being heard or respected.
You are defensive
When we feel insecure, it can be easy to put up walls and become defensive without even realizing it. We may try to hide our insecurities by acting in ways that are not true to ourselves.
Some signs of defensiveness include avoiding eye contact, lashing out, making excuses, or trying to control the conversation. It’s important to recognize these signs in order to understand our own insecurity better and take steps toward healing and growth.
You’re a clinging vine
One sign that you’re hiding insecurity is if you act like a clinging vine. This means you rely too much on the people around you and never want them to leave you. You may always need their approval for everything and be unable to make decisions without consulting them.
If this applies to you, it could be a sign of low self-esteem or even a fear of abandonment. It is important to learn how to trust yourself and make decisions independently in order to grow as an individual.
You talk too much, except when you don’t
One of the key signs that you may be hiding your insecurity is when you talk too much. This can manifest in many ways, such as by talking excessively in social situations or trying to fill silences with meaningless stories.
Alternatively, you might become unusually quiet and avoid conversations altogether when discussing topics that make you feel uncomfortable or insecure. It is important to remember that everything has a time and place. Silence can be golden if used correctly.
You’re the first one to hang up—always
You’re the first one to hang up—always. You never want to be seen as vulnerable or needy, so you always cut conversations short and make your way out of situations before anyone has a chance to see the real you.
This might seem like a good way to hide your insecurities, but it can actually be one of the tell-tale signs that someone is dealing with inner insecurity and is trying to protect themselves from being hurt. Learn more about all the secret signs that reveal insecurity and how you can confront them head-on.
Your “tells” would make you a lousy poker player
Insecurity can cause you to become overly cautious, which can make you hesitant to take risks or place big bets in a poker game. You may also play too passively or aggressively, which are both major red flags when playing poker.
When this happens, it’s likely that your insecurity is getting the best of you and causing you to make poor decisions during the game.
This article originally appeared on Frenz Lifestyle Hub
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